Below is the full case study of my daughter. I’m not sure if it’s too detailed but I’ve written 48hours in the life of Melissa as each day is different and I want Amanda to see how different both night wake ups and naps can be.
Melissa was born at 38 weeks and was a delight for us right from the start. She’s had all of her immunisations and is growing and developing well. She still hasn’t got all of her molars and I think when the nights are particularly bad that maybe her teeth are bothering her. She’s never cried whilst teething so we’ve never been able to tell when she’s teething as she shows no signs.
Her father is Albanian and I’m of Polish/Greek origin so she speaks Polish with me and Albanian with her dad. We recently had her 2-year, 3-month check with the health visitor who commented on never seeing a child who is so vocal at her age.
Melissa talks a lot and has a very vivid imagination. I’ve noticed that all the books we read really play a lot on her mind, she re-enacts them and sometimes I feel that her mind is working so hard that she finds it difficult to wind down and relax. She’s able to focus and play on her own for a long time. Melissa became a big sister 13 weeks ago. She’s settling into this new role fairly well but she does still have moments of anger towards her sister and at times gets upset if we are giving her sister attention.
Melissa is very close to her granny and we see my parents several times a week. She has close contact with some other children of a similar age. We spend a lot of time outside and I take her to some activities. She watches an average of 30 minutes of TV a day. We have a very fluid routine, which suits us quite well because we don’t get too stressed about timings (perhaps this is our downfall!).
Melissa eats well and has a good appetite. She has a balanced diet but isn’t keen on trying new fruits. She’s only eating blackberries and passion fruit, last year she ate a whole range of fruit. I stopped breastfeeding her at 15 months and she switched to bottles then. She has about 90ml milk during the day, 200ml to go to sleep at night and then roughly about 100ml during the night (it’s given in doses). She’s not keen on cheese, yoghurt or other dairy products so I feel it’s important for her to have some milk but at the moment it’s seen as a comforter for her to get to sleep.
On a good night Melissa will wake 3-4 times and on a bad night she’ll wake about 9 times. Recently she’s also had a few nights of waking at 3am and wanting to come downstairs to play. She’s actually stayed awake from 3am a few times and only gone down for a nap at 11am.
Usually she sleeps around 10pm and is mostly driven to sleep with a bottle of milk (not good I know!). She likes to listen to classical music when falling asleep in the car. My husband is more successful at getting her to sleep in bed, however it always involves a bottle of milk plus usually top ups of water and sometimes rocking to sleep.
She sleeps in her own room on a floor bed with my husband. We tried her sleeping on her own but she still woke loads and we found it more tiring getting up. As soon as she wakes up she starts asking for milk and if we don’t give it to her she starts crying and then screaming for milk. She also uses going to the potty as an excuse to get up from bed. She usually will sleep for a solid 3-4 hours and then starts waking up every hour until the morning. She wakes up at around 7:30am but this can vary depending on how she slept at night.; sometimes it’s 6:30am and sometimes 8:30am.
When she wakes during the night she gets a bottle with 30ml milk and 30ml water. This usually gets her back to sleep but she sometimes wants more. My husband takes 5 bottles to bed with him and a glass of water. If she finishes all the bottles he then gives her water…. It’s a tiring process but we feel awful seeing her cry. At times she will stay very still and quiet for about 15 minutes and it looks like she might fall asleep but then she resorts to asking for milk. Sometimes she may fall asleep without milk but wakes up a few minutes later asking for milk. It’s as though she’s stopping herself from sleeping without having a drink.
She naps in the day at around 2:30pm (she’s not tired before) ranging from 1-2hours. I’ve tried cutting naps but then she gets really tired by 5pm. She always falls asleep in the car for her daytime nap. We usually go out for a walk or play in the garden in the afternoon to get her a bit tired because her naps are late which means bedtime is late too.
She’s very sensitive to sounds at night but during the day she sleeps more deeply.
12:15am- woke up in her room on her own. Ran to the corridor. I (mum) went to her and said let’s go straight back to bed. She lay down and I did next to her. She fell back to sleep promptly. (She doesn’t want to be cuddled or stroked to sleep).
12:30am- woke again and I was back downstairs. By the time I can upstairs she managed to find her bottles. She drank one (60ml of water and milk) and was onto the next one. I told her to get back into bed. She started asking for more milk but I told her that I only have water. I told her to get back to sleep with her trains (she loves trains and has a duvet set with them). She turned around and fell back to sleep.
1:41am- woke up and ran out of bed to the corridor. My husband took her to the bathroom to wee. She then went back to bed and I lay down next to her for 15 minutes. She was lying with her eyes closed but moved every so often and in the end she started asking to go downstairs to play. I was so tired so ended up giving her some milk (60ml water and milk) and she fell asleep straight away.
3:20am- still sleeping. My husband went to sleep with her because my newborn woke up then
7am wake up. Played in room
8:30am go downstairs and play, helps with unloading dishwasher etc.
9:15am- breakfast- Cheerios, Krispies and corn flakes mixed with milk. Eats for about half an hour
10:15am went out with her dad. They drove to a cafe. Melissa ate a mini chocolate macaroon
10:55am- we all met in the park. Melissa was running around. She ate one boiled carrot and 7 green beans
11:50am- I asked if she’s tired and she said yes and automatically asked for milk (it’s always like this). My husband then took her in the car and she fell asleep in 15 minutes.
12:10pm- my husband transferred her to her bed
1:15pm- woke up. Came downstairs and playing with her sister. She started playing with her train set whilst I breastfed
2:15pm- bit of tv and lunch. Had a lot of spinach, pea and broad bean mixed with onion rice and one boiled egg yolk
3pm painting in the garden
3:30pm ate full pack of blackberries in the garden whilst reading with me
4pm- 5 pistachio nuts and a teaspoon of peanut butter
4:20pm- Playing inside mostly on her own as I’m breastfeeding. She’s very busy and content
6pm- going out for a walk with her dad
7:20pm- returned home and got ready for dinner.
7:30-8pm dinner- ate 3/4 fillet of cod, half a sweet corn and loads of chickpeas in a toMato sauce
Dessert- 3 apricots (offered fruit but she didn’t want anything)
8:30pm- playing with her bears and making food for them using dry products. Very busy and active…
9:10pm- going for w bath but she was still very energetic. She wasn’t happy about going upstairs
9:30pm- reading but finding everything in the books very funny and laughing loads.
10pm drank milk because was tired
23:10pm fell asleep but didn’t ask for extra milk today
3am- woke asking for milk, which my husband gave to her
3:10am- crying for milk
3:12am-got milk and slept
3:30- woke again, crying very loudly for milk
3:36- told that she can have a little more milk and that’s it and she must turn around and sleep and she agreed. She slept a minute after having 30ml of milk and water
NEXT DAY:
8:15am wake up. Came downstairs with her dad and played for a couple of hours
9:15am- hot cross bun for breakfast and 2 passion fruit
Driving to our friends house who have children the same age. Melissa plays with them
1pm- lunch- half roast chicken leg with green beans and peas
2:30pm – fell asleep in the car with milk
3:15pm- wake up in bed
4pm- ate a box of blackberries
Playing in the garden
7pm- spaghetti in tomato sauce with boiled carrots and broccoli
8pm- 4 apricots and a teaspoon of peanut butter
Walk for an hour
9pm bath and then watching 20 mins of tv
Drive in the car with milk and falling asleep at 10pm
12:30am- first wake up. Asks to go to the toilet and then for milk
1:30am- wake up, milk, then goes to the toilet and wants milk again
3:20am- wake up and asks for milk
4am wake up/ falls asleep on her own
4;20am- asks for milk
6am- asks for milk
6:45am – wake up
On other days we stay home in the morning and after her nap we head over to my parents’ house at around 4pm. We have dinner there and play and wait till Melissa is tired to come home so she sleeps in the car.
I’m aware of the fact that we need some sort of routine but because I’m not working, we have a new baby and Melissa has high energy levels I’d be keen to work something out allowing for us to still pop out for dinner or see our friends with children. I don’t know how we could do this without Melissa falling asleep in the car. She also wakes at random times because her nights vary so she naps at different times of the day. I’m flexible and can deal with going to bed late but I’d like for her to be able to sleep longer stretches without waking and needing milk.
