Sara
Sara has always been the slightly bigger twin and was born first (just two minutes before her sister, Summer) as she was lower and head down in the womb.
Despite being rare monochorionic-monoamniotic (MCMA) twins, which meant a very high-risk pregnancy and delivery by C-section at 32 weeks, neither have had any serious health issues. Being born this early, however, both were on C-Pap and were tube-fed for about 3 weeks until their sucking reflex developed and then they had to learn how to bottle-feed. This was prioritised over breastfeeding so that the girls could grow quickly and although I did attempt to breastfeed a lot the girls found it very difficult and frustrating. Consequently, they were exclusively fed on expressed breast milk for the first 8 weeks of their lives.
Whilst in hospital they worked up to a 3-hourly feeding routine, which we stuck with once home. It didn’t take long for my supply to diminish significantly once we got home, despite regular pumping, largely due to exhaustion, but I had built up a large amount of breastmilk that was kept frozen at the hospital so we were able to use this for a while. Around a week before what would have been their due date we introduced formula as advised by our paediatrician – first Aptamil and then Hipp Organic which was easier for the girls to digest. We started with one to two formula feeds a day but because the girls never really mastered breastfeeding this quickly increased to support their growing needs and now they have been having formula exclusively for about 2 months.
Around the time we shifted to formula the girls began experiencing a lot of trouble feeding. They would cry a lot and seemed to be in pain. We saw our paediatrician again and after trying them on nose drops (in case of restricted airways), prescription formula (in case of CMPA or lactose intolerance) and Omeprazole (in case of reflux, which they experienced in NICU) – none of which helped – were told it may be a behavioural issue. It got so bad that they never seemed hungry and every single feed became a 1.5 to 2-hour ordeal, which entailed a lot of crying. We were all miserable. Having never been good burpers, we thought wind might be to blame as they experienced the notorious ‘witching hour’ from 5-7pm. So we started giving them Dentinox in their milk which seemed to help relieve the pain somewhat but didn’t resolve the fretfulness during feeds. The witching hour passed in a few weeks but the feeding issues blighted us for 3 months – during which time we moved from 3-hourly to 4-hourly feeds, which the girls have been on for about 6 weeks now – and only over the past week or so have they been able to feed normally and actually seem hungry again. I believe this has coincided with us dropping the 3am feed, as they would always refuse the 7am bottle even when we reduced the 3am feed to just an ounce. Now that it’s gone, the girls eat well and we are even able to feed them in their bouncer chairs, which would have been completely unthinkable just a fortnight ago! Having tried so many different things (including different bottles and teats, which seemed to make no difference, so we stuck with MAM throughout), it is hard to know what caused the feeding problems but ultimately I think they just grew out of it and dropping that 3am feed also helped enormously.
Their energy levels have always been quick to dip – as newborns they could barely stay awake for 30 minutes without getting overtired, which has gradually increased to somewhere around the hour mark, but they are developing so quickly that we have a hard time keeping up with them and figuring out how long they can now be awake for before needing a nap. They do not give us many prompts besides yawning, but even then it is hard to judge because they sometimes do this shortly after waking! They often get niggly and then we try to get them to sleep as they just will not allow us to try before they reach this stage.
We suspect that they may have started teething as they are drooling (which they never did until about 2 weeks ago) and are constantly chewing their hands. They also started sucking intensely on their dummies at night, so much so that we had to take Summer’s away as it was preventing her from settling, especially after 3am. Now the same thing is happening with Sara so we are trying to wean her off it at night too. They’ve also been posseting milk, and sometimes clear liquid, far more frequently and have the occasional loose stool.
Summer
Very much as above for Sara, except that Summer was the smaller twin, born breech, and always seemed to be doing things first – such as coming off oxygen, pulling out her feeding tube, etc. Summer did however struggle with breastfeeding more and seemed to have difficulty latching whereas Sara has always had a strong latch and a slightly bigger appetite (I just could not keep this up due to exhaustion and lack of time to look after myself).
07:00 – wake up, nappy change and first feed of the day (180mls/6oz). Now they usually finish the full amount each feed, although will occasionally leave at most an ounce here or there, which they always make up for later in the day. I suspect they actually want more food now though each meal…
First nap of the day starts anywhere between 08:00-09:00 and only lasts about 45mins (which seems to be a full sleep cycle for both girls), although sometimes we are able to get them sleeping for 2 cycles (although almost never in a row) but as with all their naps this is erratic, unpredictable and always involves crying even if we hold them the whole time. Usually the morning nap is the easiest to get them down for.
Up until this week we kept them in their room, in the dark, from when they got tired until the next feed in hopes they would sleep, but this became too difficult as they would resist and fight and cry the majority of the time. We have really tried to create a calm sleeping environment but the minute they enter the nursery in the day, particularly after 11am, they start crying! So now we let them sleep in the living room for most naps, with a muslin over their head for darkness, which we put on the minute they start to get sleepy, as well as a dummy and rock them in their bouncer chairs. It sounds strange but they quite like it (sometimes) and it occasionally works. Otherwise we hold them to sleep, often with a lot of objection. Again, there seems to be no certainty with any technique.
We’ve had a considerable amount of success with the pick up/put down method at night but this has not worked for the daytime at all. They often have to fall asleep in our arms or the bouncer with our assistance. Only once or twice have they fallen asleep without any help in the day (Sara is a bit better at this than Summer, but it’s usually because she’s so exhausted she just eventually gives in. This takes hours though.) We are very reluctant to do ‘cry it out’ and very much hope we can avoid this.
11:00 – second feed of the day (180mls/6oz), nappy change, play
Second nap of the day starts anywhere between 12:00-13:00 but is very unpredictable. We were trying to get them to sleep for at least 2 hours here but have somewhat given up as they never sleep for longer than an absolute maximum of 1 hour (which in itself is rare) and it’s very difficult to connect up cycles during the day as it is. So again, we usually let them stay in the living room now and sleep in their bouncers or go for a walk and hope they’ll fall asleep in the buggy. It sounds bad but we just couldn’t sit in the dark all day anymore!
15:00 – third feed of the day (150mls/5oz – this used to be an especially difficult feed but now that the girls are eating better we have increased it from 90mls and sometimes Sara wants the full 180mls), nappy change, play
The girls will usually have a 30-45mins nap somewhere between the third feed and bath time, although this can be as short as 15-20mins some days. We are always anxious for them to sleep in the day so try to ensure they do but often have a fight on our hands!
17:30 – bath time, dress for bed
18:00 – fourth feed of the day (180mls/6oz), story time, put in sleeping bags
19:00 – bedtime, both girls are usually very sleepy or asleep by this time and go down without issue. Usually, however, they still need to burp, but as they are so sleepy we have to put them down and wait for them to get wriggly and the burp to come up. They are nearly always in bed for the night and fast asleep by 20:00. On bad days they can be unsettled until 20:30 although this is not common. They rarely wake later than this (thankfully!) until the dream feed
23:00 – dream feed (180mls/6oz of Hungry Baby Hipp Organic, but they often can’t manage more than 120mls as it is much heavier and they are so sleepy), which they sometimes wake a bit early for, depending on how long the last feed took them to finish. They usually go down well after this feed.
We recently dropped the 03:00 feed but Sara will often still wake around this time looking for her dummy. Summer has largely adapted to this change and will sleep through until around 05:30/06:00, at which point we have to settle them again until 07:00 as they often wake each other in the early hours and are most difficult to resettle during this time
Sara
I’m ashamed to say there are many as we have become so desperate for them to nap:
Dummy (which they were given in hospital without my permission and have become very attached to), bottle (this used to be more the case when their feeding was bad and we could only get them to eat if they were sleepy), bouncing, patting, shushing, muslin over head, skin-to-skin (cheek to cheek), white noise… the list is endless! And nothing seems to work anymore, particularly in the afternoon – they both cry regardless of any and all these things during the day.
Night times are much easier, they usually fall asleep without much issue after their 6pm feed in their nursery, which we keep dark and play white noise all night. It sometimes takes a while to burp them though, as they are so sleepy.
We stopped swaddling them about 3 weeks ago as they were fighting it so much and it kept unsettling them. They adapted to this change very well.
The girls sleep in Sleepyheads in their cots at night (and sometimes in the day, when they go down). We are hoping to transition out of these soon but wanted to sort out their day naps first – potentially without the Sleepyheads, although we haven’t yet tried this – and then get rid of them at night. We are quite reluctant to change anything at night because they sleep so well now, but we know the Sleepyheads have got to go!
Summer
Same as above, although Summer has recently not needed a dummy at night. We decided to take it away from her as she was sucking non-stop after 3am and was not able to settle due to this. She is doing much better now without one at night but still needs it in the day to settle for naps.
Sara
They have always been fairly good night-time sleepers, although getting them down to sleep in a cot and not being held all night was only achievable (albeit with limited success) with the help of a night nurse who worked with us for about a month, 3 nights a week, when we first brought the girls home from the hospital when they were about 4 weeks old. We’ve had another night nurse working with us since they were around 10 weeks old. In between this time we started using Sleepyheads which greatly helped us at night.
They always go down quite well at bedtime and will sleep until the dream feed at 11pm, sometimes not even waking for it. As we recently dropped the 3am feed Sara does still often wake up for this, wanting her dummy. Both girls often wake a couple of times between 4am-6am, so we try to resettle them until 7am but they don’t always go down again after 6am. This is a work in progress but as mentioned above their feeding throughout the day has greatly improved since we dropped the 3am feed.
During the night the girls are often able to be soothed and settled/resettled fairly quickly, but for daytime naps they resist and fight us to the point that we often have to give up trying to get them down for naps at all. They seem to want to be able to self-settle but scream if we put them in their cots to do so. If we put them down sleepy or even fast asleep they often wake up a few minutes later. We try bouncing, patting, shushing, dummies, putting a muslin over their heads – everything!! (Most of which used to work) – but they still cry and get very tense even when held to sleep. We are at our wits’ end and have no time to do anything else during the day except trying to get them to sleep.
Summer
Same as above, except that Summer does not now usually wake at 3am, but the nature of twins is that they often wake each other up when they cry! So if Sara wakes there is a big chance she will wake Summer. We have tried to separate them for day naps but we still encounter all the other issues and they also often hear each other from different rooms – they are SO loud!
Sara
Sadly, despite being extremely careful and self-isolating for weeks before the lockdown, we all contracted Coronavirus about two weeks ago, including the babies. My husband and Sara seem to have had it the worst – unfortunately Sara had to be admitted to hospital for 3 nights due to a fever of 40.2 degrees celsius. This was largely a precaution due to her age. She seems fully recovered now though, thankfully.
Summer
We suspect that Summer also had Coronavirus, as she developed a fever first (the day before Sara) but it was nowhere near as high or severe and she shook it off after a day or two.
In light of everything I’ve written above, I’d just like to say firstly that our girls are generally very happy, alert and sweet babies. They have overcome a tough start in life and we are very proud of them. They (and we) just need help to ensure they are getting the sleep they need so that we can all be even happier and enjoy the precious time we are lucky enough to share together.
